and irish i mean crazy latino kid with a bottle of whiskey and a shamrock hat.

two days ago was st. patricks day, and unlike the east coast….this was a fucking hoax

it was kind of heartbreaking not seeing the usual outpouring of green pedroia jerseys lining the streets of south and central boston. the seemingly endless stream of drunken teenages and twenty-somethings littering the area for the st patricks day parade.

walking around los angeles was kind of…well….depressing.

there was about five people wearing green (i think one of them was unintentional, and one of them was a child who was not at the age to dress themselves yet) and no one was announcing parties of irish car bombs and overall promoting bad life decisions for an evening of unbridled excuse.

there was just something missing.

i think thats a segway for i guess theres going to be excessive amounts of drinking this weekend at my apartment to make up for it.

and im not allowing anything less.

p.s. that guy in the photo above is mad c00l huhz?

for years ive been searching for a tattoo that would inspire me and motivate me finally into getting one. something that not only sparked my imagination but people would inquire about and actually be interested in.

and to this day the only one i actually want, i cannot get because of size and location.

fuck my life right?

and then finally this other day i realized maybe the ink with the most meaning, has little to no meaning at all…..

let me explain.

it finally dawned on me that every time i have a question, or an inquiry i normally outsource to my friends regardless looking for guidance and mentorship. and i asked myself for a tattoo why should that be any different.

and im finally going to man up and get it all done.

so what im asking of you my friends (and/or readers…i dont know how many of you exist) is to make me a tattoo. it could be something that is insanely intricate or you could make a chest piece that says “mashed potatoes”, anything counts.

im going to take the ones that fit into the guidelines and that i like the most and make it into a small sleeve for my arm.

this applies to anyone and just about anything. (there will be a small list of items i do not want on me for eternity listed below) but please let your imaginations run wild and come up with piece for me. i know it is a imtimidating question but still, this is your own oppertunity to at least have something that lasts forever on someones arm.

when are you going to have this chance again?

guidelines areeeee

-no penises….i dont care…its not funny
-no tribal work…..seriously.
-nothing too big, this is working out for a half sleeve not a chest piece

thats it, seriously, you want to make a ballin portrait of you…do it (i will probabaly not use it unless your greg porter) but you can try.

w00t tattoos.

noah’s old roomate mike is down here for a week for some actors conference in which for lack of a better term you pimp yourself for a week to different agents, producers and see what gets stirred up.

im not saying im ignorant to the entire acting thing, however i had no goddamn idea a headshot meant life or death when it came to doing these things, im blown away at some of the shit they have to do on a daily basis to whore themselves.

its impressive to say the least.

so last night after all their shit ends we end up going to the hilton (cause unlike noah and myself they apparently do their shit in style) to try to at least get absolutely hammered.

here are some low quality shots (i need a real camera, this iPhone shit isnt cutting it anymore) that were taken throughout the evening.

overall decent evening.

dont ask me why people were arm wrestling (in which i joined a round and won….and impressed myself to be blunt)

and yes, that is mikes hard on one of the table….no thats not what i brought. (however bitch drink night is coming up soon @ 301 st. andrews so stay tuned).

however highlights form last evening go as such…..

-arm wrestling and winning
-cougars
-tina turner dance offs
-endless beer consumption
-finding out blondie has a diamond encrusted in her tooth
-finding out blondies engaged
-seeing blondie make out with mike the chisled model “her presumed fiance”
-watching blondie leave the room to fuck mike
-finding out mike isnt the fiance
-laughing at adultry

yeah, dont ask what her name was cause i totally forgot but this one blond bitch completely fucked another dude while being “happily” engaged.

this is why i adore los angeles at times.

there really is no sense of outstanding morals….

by the way….theres alot of you that might read this and still not have a twitter account.

get the fuck on that, it takes five minutes to do and unlike the other two major social networking sites right now….it never changes. (it works)

so go here for my updates and follow me if you decide to join.

w00t.

today there was two entries.

one was “jimmy james toys”

simple enough, theres one there. im sure i have wrote about the toy before so its understandable why one might be searching for it….i mean, its a marketable version of me. who the hell would not want to get that as a birthday and/or christmas gift.

that was not the problem.

alas it was the other google reference entry that through me for a loop…..

….someone found and accessed my page on google by typing in “paul rudd’s cock”…..

what the fuck.

i will make this clear that yes, i did write a man crush entry months about about mr. rudd and nothing has changed.

i never made a entry dedicated to “paul rudd’s cock” however.

im not confused if i made an entry or not, that was not the problem…..im awkwardly confused why someone would choose my page as a possible vessel for being the host of one “paul rudd’s cock”…..and no noah…no jokes.

regardless, i felt i should inform people about that, it seemed decent enough to write about.

goddamn i need sleep.

noah get off my bed……..

which if you cretins have no idea what it means, it loosly translates out to unbelieveably fucking bad.

so i was invited out to the giant (and i do mean giant) staples center earlier this evening with laura, eric, mindy, ellie, lisa and vanessa to watch the hometown clippers face the cavaliers (also known as lebron james and some other dude-guys) in a match with well….no consequences what so ever. whatever, last time i went to a basketball game was last years 24 point comeback by the celtics over the lakers (hi laura, ill be reminding you about that more frequently as the season grinds down) so i was grateful for the chance to go.

heres some random shots throughout the evening.

yeah, you know, just incase you have never seen a basketball court and/or eric trowbridge (the geeky blond kid in the left hand photo, thank you for taking out the eyebrow piercing)

oddly enough the clippers played amazing for the first forty minutes….seriously amazing. if you dont know too much about the sport though you know the game is forty-eight minutes however.

with a twenty point lead they collapsed like a flan in a cupboard (thank you mr. izzard) and blew the game to lebron, from our deliciously evil nosebleed seats (placed beautifully in front of three ten year old minority bigots….then again, im sure alot of people prefer being gay as opposed to being clipper fans so thank you for the wisdom kids, i hope there is three more case of child abuse somewhere in the downtown los angeles area tonight) we got to see the cavs set up plays perfectly for the final eight minutes and date rape the clippers.

for those who didnt / do not follow me on twitter like i said : file this under things i saw coming please.

overall was a great evening except for the fact i got half the beer in the nachos (staples center needs to shell out more cash for better biodegradable trays)

aside from that for some on reason ive been stuck on cover songs for the past few days and have been analyzing the fuck out of the new punk goes pop cd (shut up all of you who think you are too indie for this and/or are better, let me at your cd collection and let me dissect it verbally….oh wait, you probably have vinyl).

to be honest most of the cd is a letdown however check out the boys in a day to remember covering the frays “over my head”, decent car jam and im quite happy with it.

then again if your going to listen to “ADTR” you might as well bust out “a shot in the dark” and have a happy car ride.

to close this out im going to give you a screen shot of a text i recieved last night from my pal joe in response to my twitter about osteoprosis and how i know im going to develop it.

(edit….due to the name in any form ive been asked to remove it from the page. which is super lame and i will openly harass you from now on)

i have some creepy fucking friends.

in just my third day here i was surrounded by five trannys drinking 40s on the metro (yes for all you boston kids, its not the T, its the metro here….very brit)

take crazy fucking gideon for example.

noah & i were watching a comedy central special when all of a sudden on a commercial break this insane son of a bitch comes on.

holy shit.

we’re going to take a trip to this store soon.

why do i have this really odd urge to eat a cell phone and get in this commercial?

thats right…….people are now driving solar cars everywhere.

whereas very impractical, its actually smart to own, with todays rising gas prices and economy woes its almost needed by everyone .

however to a free thinking person like myself im staring at the bigger picture.

we are everyday getting closer to noah & myselfs dream on accomplishing the AQUA CAR.

yeah yeah, some of you say steve jobs has gone of the media radar because of “health issues”…..in Steves worst case scenario he goes bionic and turns half of himself into a robot (which lets face it, we all would of done a long time ago pending cash flow)….i believe instead of that he is dilligently 90 stories underground working on a car thats either going to run perfectly underwater or hopefully, be made out of water.

hoo hah. believe in your dreams.

on another note, im doing nothing tonight and its kind of infuriating me.

then again doing nothing tomorrow either.

i need a constructive second job bad.

please please pleassseeeeee stop date raping my left eye.

since i returned home from beantown whatever death grip disease i caught has taken hold of my left (and only left) eye and has not let go since arriving.

ive taken dayquil, nyquil, pcp, everything trying to stop the constand amount of rubbing i have to do to alleviate the annoyance / itch / pain of my death eye.

if anybody knows a mystic that would be greatly appreciated, i have a small feeling that might be the solution to the current problem i am having.

(note : yes, also if i stare at something too long, you know, like a computer screen, it waters uncontrollably any proceeds to annoy the fuck out of me…..oh blogging)

anyways, im going to proceed to watch comedy central and trade n00dz with christine.

oh yeah, and make oatmeal (cause i fucking r00l face)

oh yeah. eyeFAIL.

i swear to god these posts are gonna be everyday again, things are getting back to normal once again and thank god.

first and foremost is i am finally back from my boston winter trip 09′ and dare i say couldnt be happier.

dont get me wrong, i love my time home with friends and family……

however with the death plauge illness bestowed on me by my friends, the semi awkwardness of some situations and the sadness of not seeing friends as long as i would of enjoyed im glad to be back to a situation where its stable and i know where im sleeping.

giant giaaaaant thank yous to gregory porter, heather & bob, miss sarah and mike for supplying what can easily be called the best nights of the trip. seriously, you guys made all of that worth it for me and i couldnt be happier about the venture.

nowwwww i just have to focus on getting all you kids out here for some west coast lovin.

to make long story short, best parts of the trip

: heather and bobs signed greeting at the wrong side of the terminal @ logan.
: fancy dinner at outback steakhouse. chocolate missle bread!
: pour house with sarah, greg, samantha, kevin & mary (thats not your coat?…i dont care)
: jam band sessions with greg and chris (that was beta testing…dont say shit)
: somebodys baking me cookies……
: THE WARRRR, HASSSS JUSTTTT BEGUNNN!
: …you date retards.
: midnight shot sessions at the hancock tavern
: asking the bro dude to take a picture…ugh bro dude.
: slither.
: assault rifles in quincy…no they arent street legal apparently.
: mike & i’s north american scavenger hunt
: motel 6, lets make a fort
: im such a man, i even cut off my nipples so i would never be a girl
: van oast!

theres alot more….mainly just a fuck ton of obscure references that would of been hysterical if you had been there.

and that is correct, i do mean you persons who didnt show up to the places i told them to.

listen, im not angry you didnt see me….if i hear anyone bitch though that i wasnt around ill kill your kids i swear to god, i got deathly ill for most of the trip and made it out to numerous public places where you all had plenty of oppertunity to see me.

long story short, ill be back, calm the fuck down.

to be blunt i had a blast being home (yes mom i do miss you too but on another level, your probably going to be reading this so dont think i left you out)

i am however psyched to be back on the weather appropriate coast of california and its 70 degree weather.

its good to breath and finally not be coughing up cold unequivical death randomly….

so in end terms, i love you all….im not coming back till the summer, come see me if you want, stay at my appt even, but dont drag me there in 10 degree weather.

yes this means you grandma as well, no dying till summer months.

oh and i found this in my basement back home as well. its my new sleeping buddy.

kruummmmmmm = epic win.

more posts soon i swear it!

heres the video blog that noah edited while i was gone as “part 2″ (considering youtube doesnt let you upload more than ten minute videos anymore (go vimeo!)….even still boston is going epic right now and i am hoping to have pictures and videos up tonight (or at the very least tomorrow)

noah im dragging your ass here by the way next time.